six summers passed i’m still in the same place where I could remember what exactly I dreamt. but things aren’t the same as how it was in the past, it’s like the flowers i desired to pluck when I was 18, now my heart doesn’t want to do the same. deep inside I want to listen to soft melodies, but I end up listening to a playlist full of darkness. this instant this sense of emotions, it’s like I’m constantly living in a dream shrouded with uncanny thoughts, i can’t go past i can’t catch the future ahead, it’s today, it’s when I’m penning my thoughts that i feel alive, but why is it so painful oscillating between things which isn’t in our control, there’s no such thing like genie’s lamp or time machine to grant a wish or to go and change anything, life sometimes it feels so uncomplicated like making paper boats, or sometimes it feels so rigid like watching it sink. but in the process of worrying overthinking dwelling i just realized today i survived one more summer.
How do I start or what can I say, there are lots of emotions that evolved while I started writing about ‘The Untamed‘(Chen Qing Ling). For a long time, I have thought of sharing my experience of watching this beautiful Chinese historical fantasy genre (Xianxia) series but since it had a huge impact on me, I was just re-watching it a lot of times that I even forgot the count. It’s been 4 years since the drama has been aired, and it’s like a rabbit hole but truly I’m so grateful that I found this series. It’s not just about the main leads but all of the actors gave life and justification to their characters.
Whenever I remember ‘The Untamed’ all I could hear is ‘Wu ji‘ in my ears, a beautiful flute song, the OST of the drama sung by the main leads themselves, Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan. The best part of this song is the heart-touching poetic lyrics with a flute melody which made me fall in love with the Chinese language and made me want to learn it as well. This drama is 50 long episodes, I always don’t miss the end of the episodes where we can listen to this OST with drama scenes and I never once watched it without crying because it’s way too emotional.
Wu ji
Wu Ji performance by Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan
Brew a cup of life and death’s joy and grief, to honour a young man The bright moon is still the same, so there is no need for sadness Why not soar high and free as a bird with the winds and waves And sing this one song together to the world~Wu ji
The live-action series is adapted from the Boy Love’ novel ‘Mo Dao Zu Shi‘ ( Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation) by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. Though I haven’t read the novel and watched the anime version of this series, still I loved the storyline which was slightly different from the novel because of Chinese censorship of LGBTQ content. Everything about this series is perfect because of the actors who carried the show with their excellent acting.
The story follows the adventure of two soulmates, cultivators from their respective clans, who fight for justice and peace in the world. Lan Zhan aka Lan Wangji, who is always seen in an exquisite white robe carrying his sword (Bichen) from the Gusu Lan Clan (Cloud Recesses), and Wei Ying aka Wei Wuxian often seen in an elegant black outfit carrying his sword (Suibian) and in the later half of the story with his flute (ChenQing) from Yunmeng Jiang Clan (Lotus Pier).
Xiao Zhan as ‘Wei Wuxian’Wang Yibo as ‘Lan Wangji’
So the best part is, their appearance is what their characters are exactly about like black and white, both are contrasting to each other. Lan Zhan is cold, upright, loyal, and introverted while Wei Ying is kind, energetic, mischievous, and extroverted. Despite their utmost differences, they create a beautiful bond, and unrestrained friendship which gives us chills that how can a relationship can be written like this so pure and trustworthy.
It’s very hard to tell the whole story as it is quite complicated. The plot starts with Wei Wuxian fighting against all five clans in the nightless city and no one wants him alive except for Lan Wangji, his soulmate. All in vain, in the end, Wei Wuxian throws himself off the cliff and dies. After 16 years, he resurrects through a self-sacrificing ritual and reunites with his soulmate, and solves the past mistakes and mysteries in his new life. So from now on I’m going to address them as Wei Ying and Lan Zhan, as it feels closer, and also it is the way they call each other affectionately.
The first half of 50 episodes is a flashback of Wei Ying, Lan Zhan, and other clan disciples attending the cultivation training in the Gusu Lan clan. This is where their friendship starts, at first Lan Zhan and Wei Ying, are like Yin and Yang, opposite to each other in their personality and thoughts. But as they go through life and death together on their adventure journey to defeat the Evil Wen Clan, the bond starts becoming stronger and they become lifelong soul mates. The latter half of the series is when Wei Ying comes back from death and starts a new life, I especially like the second half more as this is where both come to know about each other’s love and how much they have gone through and sacrificed for their loved ones.
“I Used To Think Of You As My Soulmate. I Still Am.”—Lan Wang Ji/ Wei Wu Xian
There are so many side stories and supporting characters, but this blog, I’m dedicating it to WangXian (that’s what we call them). So, I’m going to share a few of my favorite scenes from the series which made me feel what love is all about and made me think about how can someone create a story like this which truly touches your heart, soul, mind, and everything.
Reunite
Before the flashback episodes, we can get to see the scene at Dafan mountain where Lan Zhan and Wei Ying meet after 16 years where Wei Ying wears a mask to disguise himself to not get recognized by the people he met in his previous life. Despite that, our Lan Zhan founds that it’s him. When I first watched it I couldn’t get how exactly he found out that it is Wei Ying. But then comes the surprise, the song which Wei Ying played with his flute to calm down Wen Ning (ghost general) is composed and sung by Lan Zhan for Wei Ying when they were stuck in the turtle cave which only both of them had listened to and no one else. In the whole series, Lan Zhan speaks less but most of the things he speaks through his actions and expressions. Everything falls into the right place when he holds Wei Ying’s wrist and their long stare at each other with their song playing in the background. It screams you are back, we are together, and I will never lose you again.
Significant other
This is one of the sweetest things in the whole series, it’s about the sacred headband that all Lan Clan members must wear on their forehead. Lan Zhan is very mindful when it comes to his headband, as it means ‘to regulate oneself’ and to follow the rules. In episode 6, when Lan Zhan was drunk, his headband was tilted so Wei Ying attempts to make it straight but Lan Zhan knocks his hand away saying no one is allowed to touch it other than his parents and significant other. Later in the same episode, both of them get stuck in a Cold pond cave of Could Recesses. There Wei Ying gets attacked by an ancient zither ( Lan Clan instrument ) which attacks whoever doesn’t belong to Lan Clan. Then our Lan Zhan without hesitating removes his headband and ties it to both of their wrists with it. Because of this, the Zither identifies Wei Ying as Lan Zhan’s partner and accepts him as one of them. This is the start of their relationship, as Lan Zhan does something out of the blue that he doesn’t do for anyone.
The following episodes 13 and 14 are one of my favorites as in almost all episodes we could barely see Lan Zhan speak more but in these episodes, we can get to see a long conversation between him and Wei Ying. Also, we can see another headband scene and Lan Zhan’s singing song for Wei Ying which will make us assume how far their relationship has grown. Because of evil Wen Clan both of them get stuck in a cave where Lan Zhan’s leg gets badly wounded while trying to kill the turtle monster. Wei Ying applies medicine for his wound and to wrap his injured leg he removes the sacred headband of Lan Zhan without asking him and also puts it back on his forehead when he’s asleep even after knowing the importance of it.
After fighting for a long, both of them kill the monster, and Wei Ying gets badly hurt. This is when the famous theme song ‘Wu Ji’ is introduced which is played in every scene of them together. To comfort Wei Ying, Lan Zhan sings a self-composed song for him. When he asks the name of the song, we as viewers can see a blurred image of Lan Zhan lip-syncing ‘WangXian’ (Wu Ji) but our Wei Ying passes out before knowing it.
All these moments show how far they have come and how they are so ready to do anything for each other.
So, here comes the end of Part-1, will continue our Wangxian scenes in Part-2. Stay tuned.
i’m not different, i repeat i don’t know how to name the feeling which i’m going through, like a bubble floating in a water it remains for a few seconds and bursts out as nothing happened. pondering over with multiple thoughts is one of my never-ending hobbies, sometimes these thoughts carry me to the universe which has no existence.
i’m not different, i repeat love is a word that rarely comes into my life in shapes of quotes or poetries, everytime i read those i imagine walking down the street which i call it, ‘path to my heart’ every step i took i have been driven to this question how it feels to be loved or loving someone.
i’m not different, i repeat a part of me is a raging fire as well honey dripped flower i’m reckoning questions which the whole cosmos has n number of answers, but this ain’t tiring cause in the thirst of experiencing i’m going nowhere but becoming an art with life as an artist.
how fascinating it is! every ounce of happiness has beautiful stories so imperceptible, this charm, this smile, it never came all at once.
it’s a magical dream that has been appearing for real right from when my eyes began to saw this tremendous world.
all those colorful candies in a packet have the same taste, but I pick the red one and believe it tastes better. Maybe, Maybe I choose what I relished and neglected others not giving a chance.
but the table always turns it’s not the same anymore, until the tiny sparkles of love and acceptance entered into life, to replenish the thoughts of unseen specks of joy.
and i’m here with a fruitful reflections to see the love in the tiniest forms, to accept the blues to be prettier not to augment the negatives to treat everything everyone in the same way, that’s how I surmise the story turns so memorable so meaningful!
I hold myself and stare at the drunken skies with a gush of thoughts. As someone who has become extremely introverted while dwelling at home for a long period, the past which I felt of it as an endangered species comes back and torments me now and then. I just walk along the street and look at different types of people, everyone in their separate world as I’m. And wonder how this planet is so biased, the one has everything that they want without worries while the other has merely anything but struggles.
I suddenly remembered something stuck in my mind which made more sense in all of my insanity. The Protagonist from one of my favorite Chinese dramas has a sword named ‘Suibian’ which means ‘whatever’. Having so many names in his mind he ends up calling it whatever. This simple word sums up everything in all of my overflowing thoughts that I end up concluding as whatever and moving on.
In the dark days of mine where sunsets sob, and flowers in my backyard withers before blooming, all I think of it is ‘whatever’ though it is hard forgetting the pain, but still gets cured someday.
I wanted to share so many things for a long time, but I strived with where to begin or how to end it and still do. I don’t remember when was the last time I looked at the sky and smiled happily but in my memory each day I’m seeing myself watching the sky and admiring wholeheartedly. And sometimes when I think about what will happen next, I won’t lie. I’m scared and my eyes show fear as if I’m falling from the sky. You know, how pleasant it is that you know you are fantasizing about everything around you yet it’s not a big deal. Because it is something that gives you happiness killing away the sadness.
I feel surviving these days itself is like a cherry cake added with barriers and hope. To taste and keep moving on is what I’m doing and that’s how the year started.
I crave thousands of things in a day, knowing that it can’t happen in real. I look at the freshly bloomed flower and think of the day when I would be that flower showering happiness around me. I stand solitary staring at the waves, imagining how it comes back and forth. Likewise, my thoughts which are not steady and struggling. I wish to become colors, I wish to become a rainbow but reality doesn’t exist in my dictionary. But no period is constant.
I always wonder how everything unique happens at the same time in the universe. How we are bound by many things, but we all experience different moments. Sometimes, the space in my mind holds so many mysteries unrevealed, and it just doesn’t want to be revealed. That 10-year-old me, who thought of becoming something, she’s not the same anymore. And that’s when you discover what’s reality is.
Every bit of possibilities changes, like how the moon changes its shape, yet it becomes full one day. Maybe that’s how we are, we become something one day grabbing the right moment. And that’s how maybe life is, there is nothing constant, there is nothing that could stop you from seeking and evolving.
And I’m here, a normal being painting my space seeking and evolving…
today it’s all about me and poetry, first time when I tried to search, smell, taste what is poetry? i thought it’s all about jamming rhyming words in the end, but all I heard was it’s more than we would ever imagine! i was protruding at the edge to experience the unknowns, like a thunderbolt my questions remained questions but I never stopped to seek that priceless feeling which waked up the fairy in me with answers, all those thoughts which lied static on my restless mind, slowing weaved into words, reviving the true feeling of poetry, that was hidden somewhere in me, flabbergasting my inner soul with hope to relive, all those fouls i carried so far filled up my diary but, you know what it’s beautiful intriguing for I tasted poetry how it trulyfeels with not just rhyming but all of the unseen with its power of healing!
The day is becoming dark, bright flamed stars show up in the deep blue sky Everything is changing, so the moods of people to welcome the night filling it with glowing yellow lanterns Chairs and tables are getting occupied as visitors come by one by one to enjoy the air-filled smokey stars Busy humans in one place amidst the gloomy buildings provoking a thought of aliveness in leaden walls and windows, the cafe terrace the calmer it looks concealing the hustles!
There’s a gloomy song floating in my mind, penetrating my thoughts by creating a syndrome to affect my heart just when the song was about to end it turned blue and the world I see looks upside down, and you know what i’m daydreaming, just when i’m completely drowned in it ammi calls for help to save the curry in the stove from getting burnt I was about to turn down the heat, but it’s too late too late that everything around is static the unpleasant odor hit my nose and I was awake hearing my ammi’s tantrums, everything doesn’t happen without mistakes every day we get new experiences our life is a tricky ocean it’s vast and has beautiful endings, when death remains a mystery we live solving our aliveness we continue oscillating between knowns and unknowns till the world stops, we do pass our day working, laughing, dreaming in spite of how much we feel raging inside we do oscillate and the song again floats in my mind and I daydream again and hear ammi’s tantrums maybe these all have an end or may not but still, we continue to dwindle or thrive we oscillate that’s why we exist!
Ps : ‘Starry Night’ is something very much special in my life, just gave a try using color pencils. 💫
Mining souls 